Brain Dump

I really don't have it in me to construct a sentences and paragraphs today, so a bullet point brain dump is what you're getting. Sorry.

• The Big Man started a new job on Monday, so I've taken the week off work to look after Max and arrange some childcare for him. The Big Man has been working from home since Max was 10 weeks old and I went back to work. It's a big deal for me, putting him into childcare... But Max and I spent an hour together at the centre on Tuesday and it does seem really awesome. I'm sure he will love it.

• Ever since Max was born I was adamant that Max would go to family daycare when the time came. It wasn't until I actually had to go and find somewhere for him to go that I changed my mind and decided on a childcare centre. It might seem like tough love, but I kind of like the idea that he will have to become a bit more independent and stand up for himself a bit more in a group environment. Mean Mummy?

• The Big Man has been working really long hours for his new job. He's at work again this morning (Saturday) and has already done 60 hours this week. He's going to need to let his boss know that it can't stay like that, we have a baby and a life outside work. He needs balance. His role is a management position, but I still think that they are asking too much of him. A happy and balanced life will allow him to be so much more focused when he is at work anyway...

• This week has been really rough for me. I started out with a cold on Monday morning, but was all better by Tuesday. Then Wednesday night I started to feel really nauseous and off colour. I have spent the last two days (Thursday and Friday) with an upset stomach, vomiting, constant nausea, and no appetite. Nasty. I thought I was feeling better this morning, but as I got up and started playing with Max it hit me again. Max is napping now and I am in bed with my laptop and bucket :(

• Last night I was feeling my worst, but still cooked the Big Man dinner, did his laundry, cleaned the house, vacuumed the floors and moped the bathrooms because I know how hard he has been working and didn't want him to come home to mess and no dinner. Does anyone else get the cleaning bug real bad whenever they get sick? I think it is maybe my subconscious telling me that my surroundings could be making me sick and I need to scrub all the germs away...

• I am so grateful to my truly awesome friend Emma who took Max for two and a half hours yesterday so that I could have a sleep. I owe her big time!

• The cost of childcare is absolutely staggering. At this point I am struggling to work out how we can get ahead whilst paying those kind of fees... Hopefully I get a promotion and start earning some decent money in the very near future.

• I am really missing my sister, my bff Erin and my Hervey Bay girlfriends at the moment. I would love to be closer to them all and be able to catch up with them on a weekly basis.

• I haven't been taking photos lately. In fact I can't remember when the last time I picked up the camera was. You will just have to trust me when I say that Max is still incredibly gorgeous :)

• I have still been reading all of my favourite blogs, but I haven't been commenting much lately. I still love you all and will get around to commenting soon xx
  

Ok, brain dump over for now. I am going to try and get some sleep before Max wakes up again.

So Close

Max is almost crawling! He can do it if he really tries, but it's like he kind of forgets what works and has to start over each day. Or he will almost have it, but will then decide to try something else and end up going backwards instead. So cute!

The Big Man took this video of him today while I was at work...



My adorable little baby is growing up :)

The Monster Eats

We've been feeding Max solids for almost a month now and he has been absolutely loving it.

These pictures are from the first night that we fed him solids. At first he was not at all impressed. It was like he couldn't understand why we were putting funny tasting stuff in his mouth.


Since then things have got much better though and there hasn't been a flavour combination that he hasn't liked. And we've tried lots. Chicken & sweet corn, pumpkin, potato and roast beef, apple custard, banana & mango, spinach, pea, apple and broccoli and heaps more. All good...

... Until we tried to feed him pasta bolognaise. It was a little bit chunky with tiny bits of pasta in it, so a very different texture to anything he'd eaten before, but considering Max is part Italian we thought he would love it. Apparently not. His reaction was so cute that we taped it on the iphone.



I tried feeding it to him again a couple of days later, but he still wasn't liking it. He'll eat broccoli, peas, apple and spinach but not pasta... go figure!

{Sorry for the dodgy camera skills, the Big Man is feeding Max and filming. He's sitting on the table because we still haven't got around to buying him a highchair!}

Messy Weekend

This weekend had been a wash out.

It's Sunday night and my house is still crazy messy. Dishes in the sink, the floors haven't been vacummed, the laundry is in piles on the couch, there are rubbish bags in the laundry and no groceries in the fridge or cupboard.

My excuse? I've been sick. First with a cold and then with a stomach bug for the last couple of days.

The Big Man has been great. He let me sleep for four hours yesterday in the middle of the day and whilst I was sleeping in this morning he loaded up the dishwasher and did some laundry.

Worst part? One of my neighbours showing up with a box of nappies for me. So nice of her, it would have been really rude of me to not invite her in for a coffee. I sat her down in the front room {which was the only clean room in the house}, but whilst I was making coffee she came into the kitchen to see if she could help me... The shame. She has four kids of her own though so I hope that she at least understands.

Luckily I have tomorrow off, hopefully I can get the house cleaned up then.

I'm off to bed.

Not Thirty

Today is my birthday, I'm not going to tell you how old I am... but I'm about as close to thirty as you can get without actually turning the big three-oh.

The morning didn't get off to the best of starts with Max in bed with us from about 3am. For the last couple of days he has stopped sleeping through and last night neither of us really wanted to get up every half hour, so we let him 'sleep' with us.

When we did get up the day started getting better. I got some gorgeous and thoughtful presents from the Big Man, as well as a much needed cup of coffee. After I dropped the Big Man off at the golf course I picked up my sister and niece and went down to the esplanade to have breakfast with some of my best girlfriends. I got spoilt with more presents and had a lovely, relaxing breakfast {with more coffee to make up for the lack of sleep}.


The rest of the day was spent with my sister, her gorgeous family, the Big Man and Max. We played board games, ate lots of food and had a delicous cake.

A perfect day!

My First Mother's Day

Today was absolutely gorgeous! My first Mother's Day and most definitely my best one {well so far anyway!}.

My day started off with the Big Man looking after Max's first feed so that I could have a sleep in. Considering sleeping is one of my all time favourite activities, it was the perfect start to the day.

I did get out of bed eventually and we headed down to the park for breakfast with friends of ours that were also celebrating their first Mother's Day.

It was a gorgeous day, a little bit cool and sunny. Just how I like it!

After we finished up with breakfast the Big Man took some photos and then Dez and I walked home with our babies.


Later on in the day the Big Man made me the best tasting blueberry pancakes I have ever tasting in my life. I do tend to exaggerate a bit (maybe a lot), but seriously these pancakes were ridiculously good!

We finished up the day with lots of Max cuddles and pizza with friends.

Perfect!

I hope those of you that were celebrating Mother's Day today had a lovely day too!

All About Me

It's been quite a while since I started this blog, but I've never got around to writing an 'About Me' page. Seeing as there's no time like the present, here it is...

I'm happily married to the man of my dreams {the Big Man}, we got married in September 2008 on a perfect day in beautiful Hervey Bay.

A year and a half later I gave birth to our first son, Max. Max is the absolute love of my life {which you have probably already guessed based on the number of posts and photos featuring him!}.

Shortly before our wedding the Big Man and I built our first home. I say 'built', but really it's still a work in progress and probably still will be for the next couple of years. We have a lot to do before it will be finished and we're saving up a little bit at a time. In the meantime it's still very liveable, but by no means perfect.

The rest of our family is made up of our two adorable pets, Cooper and Ollie. Cooper was our first baby and will always have a very special place in my heart. We've been really fortunate with our pets, they're both very sweet natured and love each other as much as they love us.

As well as looking after Max I also work part-time at a job that I really love. As guilty as it makes me feel to say it out loud I often enjoy having a day off from looking after Max... The Big Man works from home and takes care of Max on the days that I work, so really it works out perfectly.

Besides being a Mum and working I have a few hobbies that I enjoy. I love making things {crafts, cards, invitations, cupcakes etc}, planning parties and catching up with my girlfriends. I have also recently taken up photography, I'm not very good yet, but it's something that I really love so hopefully I'll get better with practice.

I've been blogging for over two years now and I can't imagine not doing it. I'm guilty {like I'm sure many bloggers are} of writing blog posts in my head as my day unfolds and have been working hard at becoming a better blogger.

I have met so many lovely people through blogging and hope to meet many more.

Hopefully this wasn't to boring if you already know me and if you're new {or have never commented before} please say hi and let me know a little bit about yourself and leave me a link to your blog.

Happy blogging!



*Image credit - wedding photo is by Jodie from Litzow Photography

Five Months

***

Dear Max,

Wow, this last month has been so much fun! All of a sudden you seem to be growing and learning so much quicker. It's like everything is happening all at once and I can barely keep up.


By far the cutest thing that you have learnt to do this month is laugh. At first you would only laugh for Daddy, which I completely understand, he makes me laugh all the time too! But a couple of days after Daddy had first told me about you laughing I was lying on the floor blowing raspberries on your belly and all of a sudden you started to giggle. It was so adorable that I started to laugh as well, which made you giggle even more. Did I mention how incredibly adorable it was?!


We think you may also have your first best friend... Not baby Kate or Ethan like we expected. It's Cooper. You look for him when he's not around, smile at him when he is and will spend ages patting him and pulling on his ears. At first it didn't really seem like Cooper wanted to be BFFs, but he's coming around. Now he will happily let you pat him and comes up to you for smooches all the time. Awww puppy love!


Playtime has recently got a lot more fun too. You can sit up for quite a while if we put you into a sitting position and can sometimes sit yourself up when you're leaning back on a pillow. You're really good at holding on to your toys and will reach out and grab them if we hold them out for you. While we play you chat away in your own special baby language. I try to get you to say Mama about a million times a day, but the closest you've managed is 'ah'. Close enough for 5 months I think :)


Your favourite games at the moment are row-row-row the boat, incy-wincy spider and of course your jungle bouncer. When we play incy-wincy you sometimes try and copy my hand movements and always smile when the 'sunshine dries up all the rain'. Probably because you're a summer baby yourself!

Last but not least you have also started to reach out for me when you want me to hold you... and how can I possibly refuse. You are the cutest, sweetest, snuggliest baby in the world.

As always I love you more than you can possibly imagine and will always do so.

Lots and lots and lots of love,

Mummy xx

Anzac Day

This year was Max's first Anzac Day. He might be too small to remember, but we still wanted to take him down to the Anzac March and Ceremony.


It was a gorgeous day in Hervey Bay and we caught up with quite a few friends as we followed the end of the parade through to the memorial.

{My friend Ange's gorgeous Son Tristan}

I hope that Max will grow up with pride in his country and I think that remembering our Anzacs is an important part of that.

My Brown Eyed Boy

I always thought that babies kept their blues eyes for ages and that they changed to their true colour between one to two years of age...

Not Max. He was born with grey eyes {they were never really blue} and by the time he was two months old we could tell that they were turning brown.

Now at four and a half months he most definitely has brown eyes.


We never thought he had much of a chance at keeping his blue/grey eye colour seeing as the Big Man has brown eyes and I have green. But I did think he would have baby blues for a bit longer than this...


Not that I don't love his brown eyes. I think they are gorgeous {of course!}.

Like Father Like Son

***

A couple of weeks ago the Big Man's grandparents sent me through a photo from when the Big Man was a baby.

I was amazed, the resemblance is striking. Max looks so much like his Daddy!

When I was pregnant the Big Man used to joke that I would be in a lot of trouble if the baby came out black (am I allowed to say that?). Hopefully these photos put his mind at ease!

T xx

Ups and Downs

***

One of the things that has really surprised me since having Max is how different any two days can be. One day Max can be an absolute angel and the very next day a monster!

Yesterday I got lucky and Max was in one of his great moods. He was happy and smiley all day, napped really well and the highlight was when I took him grocery shopping and he laughed and smiled at strangers from the capsule on the trolley. It was so sweet, baby smiles can melt even the coldest of hearts!

Today I was back at work and the Big Man was not so lucky with Max. By the time the two of them picked me up after I finished work the Big Man was exhausted. Apparantly Max spent the entire day crying, wanting to be held and refusing to sleep. Not nice Max! I'm not sure what was going on with him today, but it was like he was a completely different baby.

I'm hoping that tomorrow he reverts back to his usual smiley self. If he repeats the monster behaviour too many times I'm not sure that the Big Man will be as happy about looking after him while I work.

Crossing my fingers!

T xx

Home Alone

***

Max and I just had our first ever night without the Big Man home {he has gone down to the Gold Coast for a friends bucks party}. I won't lie, I was scared. I don't like to be alone at the best of times and especially not at night.

I think that Max must have noticed that I was nervous... He slept like normal until I came to bed, but after his 10pm feed he would only sleep if he was in the bed with me. Several times throughout the night I tried to put him back into his bed, but he would kick all of his blankets off and grumble until I picked him up. Then, as soon as I put him down in my bed he would fall asleep.

Who I am to complain though, waking up to sweet baby breath is the next best thing to waking up next to the Big Man!

This morning we had a bit of sleep in and now Max is as happy as larry, playing on his playmat and staring at himself in his mirror.

Hopefully the Big Man gets home soon so that I can tell him how brave we were!

T xx

A Busy Weekend

***

My first week back at work was topped off by a busy weekend as well and I am now officially exhausted.

On Friday night, the Big Man, Max and I drove over an hour to the other side of Brisbane to help celebrate our friend Doug's 30th Birthday. As we always do when we catch up with this particular group of friends, we had a blast! Because I started work at 7am the next morning we weren't able to stay late and the Big Man needed to stay sober so that he was in a good frame of mind to take care of Max the next day. The Big Man was a bit disappointed that he wasn't able to let loose and drink with the boys, but I think that being a Dad outweighed his feeling of missing out!

After I finished work the next day I went to my companies Sales Awards Night. It was my first night out without Max and the Big Man... I had a great time, but by 10pm I was ready to come home to my boys :)

One thing that I found really interesting was realising how different some of my collegues are outside of work. I guess when people have a few drinks they feel like they can relax and show more of themselves!

I had a great weekend, but I was so glad to have Sunday, Monday and Tuesday off to catch up on my sleep. (How old does that make me sound!!).

T xx

My First Week Back

***
I survived my first week back at work... and I even managed to enjoy myself!

I had a bit of a rocky start though. By 10am on my first day I was in tears in the bathroom, well not just tears... huge racking, slightly hysterical sobbing. Definitely not my finest moment.

When I left for work in the morning I asked the Big Man to keep his phone close by because I would be calling at morning tea, lunch and afternoon tea to see how Max was doing. So when he didn't answer on my first break I kind of (totally) lost it. I went back to my desk and tried to be brave, but I couldn't keep it together.

Whist I was in the bathroom I managed to get hold of the Big Man - after I sent him the following text message: why didn't you answer? If you don't call me in the next 20 minutes I will be coming home, which will mean I probably get fired. Which will probably happen anyway seeing as I'm in the bathroom crying instead of working - overly dramatic much!

Anyway the Big Man told me that he was doing fine and Max was perfectly happy :). So I dried my eyes and went back my desk.

After that I settled down heaps and didn't have any other dramas. At the end of my first day I felt really happy, which made me realise that I've made the right choice to go back.

T xx

Valentine's Day

***

The Big Man and I spent our first Valentine's Day as parents in one of the most beautiful corners of the world - Montville on the Sunshine Coast Hinterland.

It was an absolutely perfect day.

We started out by going to Kondalilla National Park and walking through to the rockpool and Kondalilla Falls. It was a really easy walk and it was just beautiful!



Along the way we saw a snake. I think that it was a incredibly venomous yellow belly something-or-other snake. The Big Man thinks it was a green tree snake. I'll let you make your own mind up... (click on the photo to enlarge).


The plan was that when we got to the rock-pool all three of us would go for a swim. We also imagined that it would just be the three of us. Turns out about 50 other people had the same idea! Still it was beautiful anyway, and the tanned, buff, young men jumping off the rocks into the pool made for entertaining viewing (if you like that kind of thing, which I don't, I only have eyes for the Big Man ;) ).

The Big Man decided to still go for a swim, but it was way to cold for me and Max. So we sat on the rocks and did some people watching.


The walk back from the falls was definitely not as easy... It was all uphill :( Very pretty, but very much uphill!


After we finished up in the National Park we drove into Montville and decided to have lunch at Montville Cafe, Bar and Grill. It was delicious, we will definitely be going back there again! It also had a really great atmosphere. We sat outside in the garden and all of the tables were really spread out and were either situated under the trees or covered by big umbrellas. Really lovely.


Max was a super-star all day and the three of us had the nicest day :)


I hope you all had a lovely Valentines Day too!

xx Tam

(Only downside to the day... I forgot to charge the camera battery so all of the photos were taken with the iphone).

Glad to Have a Husband

***

Today I am absolutely in awe of single parents. How on earth do they do it?

Last night Max woke every two hours, but rather than having a good feed before going back to sleep he would just snack for three or four minutes before refusing to feed anymore and falling fast asleep. Which is probably why he would wake again in two hours...

By the time he woke me up at 5 this morning I was so tired and cranky. I hopped back into bed with him and laid on my side to feed him, but rather than feeding he would just stare at me and scream.

Because I was so tired and cranky I kind of lost my temper, I left him on the bed with the Big Man, stormed out of the room and curled up on the bed in the spare room with Cooper.

After about ten minutes I had calmed down enough that I decided to go and check on him in case he was giving the Big Man a hard time. He wasn't. The two of them were sound asleep in bed together. I grabbed a bottle of expressed milk from the fridge, gave it to the Big Man and then went back to bed in the spare room again.

A couple of hours later when the Big Man woke me up he was telling me all about the huge smiles and giggles that Max was giving him before he fed him. So it must have just been me. Max was probably picking up on my foul mood and reacting to it.

At the end of the day I am just so glad that there are two of us and that I have the option to take a break when I need one.

T xx

Should've Seen That Coming

***

Yesterday I think I broke one of the unwritten rules of bringing up a child.

I blogged about how well things are going.

Obviously I wasn't thinking straight.

Last night was horrible. Max woke up like usual at 2am, but nothing would make him happy. He refused to feed and just kept screaming and screaming. He seemed to be really hungry, so I'm not sure why he wouldn't feed. Maybe crying hysterically just seemed more important to him?

After about 15 minutes of me trying to feed him and then another 15 minutes of me bawling my eyes out and trying to ignore him (definitely not my finest moment), I gave in and made him up a bottle of formula. I was desperate to make him happy and when I've had trouble feeding in the past I've found that if I express and bottle feed he tends to settle. Anyway at 2am I really didn't feel like listening to him scream while I expressed for half an hour (by hand). So formula it was.

Cheeky little baby didn't even seem to notice that it wasn't my milk. He drank half of the bottle before falling asleep.

We put him in his bassinette, which we can normally do even when he's only half asleep, but he wasn't having a bar of it last night. The only way we could get him to sleep was to hold him. The Big Man was wide awake by this stage so he walked around the bedroom for another 15 minutes rocking Max. He would fall asleep straight away, but as soon as he was put down he would wake up and start screaming again.

Eventually the Big Man was able to put him down and although Max woke up again he must have been exhausted because after grouching for a few minutes he fell asleep properly. At four am!

Anyway, it's been a long day (my afternoon nap didn't even touch the sides) so Max and I getting ready to head off to bed now, hopefully tonight goes a little more smoothly.

T xx

Good Bye 2009

This year has been a great one for the Big Man and I. I think it is one of those years that I will look back on and smile about in the years and decades to come.

Of course it hasn't been all smooth sailing, but the good this year has by far out weighed the bad.

2009 Highlights (in chronological order):

• Adopting Ollie, our laid back, cruisey Cat
• Finding a great job that I really enjoy and having the added bonus of working with a fantastic group of people
• Finding out that I was pregnant
• Telling the Big Man that were going to have a baby
• Telling our families and friends about the baby
• Seeing Max for the first time at our 10 week scan
• All of the pregnancy milestones, first kick, first kick that the Big Man felt, seeing Max move inside my belly, first hiccups, etc
• Not getting fired from that job when I needed a lot of time off through out my pregnancy
• Celebrating my first wedding anniversary
• Seeing Beyonce in concert
• Cooper turning two and finally turning into a sane dog rather than a uber-excited puppy
• My Baby Shower
• Giving birth
• Sharing Max with all of our Families
• Having my Family visit for Christmas
• Celebrating the New Year with thew Big Man's Family

It was such a good year that I have probably missed a million things!

I hope you all have a wonderful 2010!

T xx

Not Yet Sinking

I've been holding together really well since Max was born. I've had a few moments where I've shut myself in my room and cried, but I'm sure every new Mum has times like those.

It was easier to keep it together while I had my Mum and Sister staying with me. Last night it all fell apart though. I think it was four weeks worth of pretending that I feel great (and sometimes I do), that lead to my monumental breakdown last night.

It's not that I'm not happy, I'm incredibly happy. It's not that I don't love being a Mum, I think it's the greatest thing in the entire world. It's not that I don't have any support, I have an amazing Husband, endless support from my family and the Big Man's and beautiful friends. It's the fear that's getting to me. I don't worry constantly, but when I do it get's out of control really quickly.

Yesterday we were supposed to drive up to Hervey Bay. We packed our bags, loaded up the car and strapped Max into his seat. I was about to get in the car myself when I realised that if we got into an accident and rolled the car, that any object loose in the car could hit Max in the head and hurt him. This lead to a stand-off between the Big Man, it started out with me wanting him to repack the car and ended up (over an hour later) with me curled up around Max in the bedroom refusing to let the Big Man come anywhere near him.

The rational part of me kept thinking 'this is stupid, just get in the car', but I couldn't get past the fact that if we drove anywhere Max could get hurt. I was hysterical, ridiculously irrational and it took hours for the Big Man to calm me down enough so that we could have a conversation.

I feel better today, but I'm still a little bit teary and keep crying for no reason.

I guess I just need to work out if is my anxiety coming back and making me feel like this or if all Mums feel like this and it's competely normal...

T xx